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Dealing with British bureaucracy

My British passport which still currently declares me to be an EU citizen © Ricky Yates — My current British passport © Ricky Yates

Long-standing readers of my blog will know that I have previously written numerous times about my various run-ins with Czech bureaucracy. For example, trying to exchange my UK driving licence for a Czech one, which I described as ‘a Kafkaesque experience‘. Therefore I think it is only fair that I should also write about some illogicalities of British bureaucracy that I’m currently dealing with.

As I explained in an earlier post, my UK passport expires in December 2016. Whilst because of Brexit, I am giving serious consideration of changing my nationality should I lose the right to freely reside in any EU member state, that will not happen before December. Therefore, I have had to sort out how and when I can obtain a new UK passport.

As I explained in that earlier post and in response to comments on it, the days of the British Embassy issuing new passports to its citizens resident here are long gone – everything has been centralised in the UK. And because I cannot risk being without my passport for up to four weeks, which is what would be the case if I were to apply from Prague, completing an online application form, paying the fee and then sending everything off to a UK Passport Office, I’ve decided to bite the bullet.

I am going to use Her Majesty’s Passport Office Premium Service which should result in my new passport being issued to me, no more than four hours after submitting my application. Of course, this doesn’t come cheap; it costs £128.00 which I’ve already paid. Ironically, I’ve actually benefited from one consequence of the recent Brexit referendum. The fall in the value of Sterling means paying that fee has cost me CZK 300 less than it would have done on Thursday 23^rd June 🙂

I have arranged to fly to the UK on the evening of Wednesday 27^th July, one day earlier than I was originally going to do, in order to officiate at my son Phillip’s wedding. I will then spend most of the following day in Peterborough, obtaining my new passport. But this is where British bureaucracy is unthinking and leaves much to be desired, for those who like me, live outside of the UK.

To use Her Majesty’s Passport Office Premium Service, you have to go online and book an appointment at a Passport Office, in my case the one in Peterborough, and pay the £128.00 fee. But it is only possible to book an appointment no more than three weeks in advance. I’ve had my flight booked for a couple of months, but was only able to get a definite appointment last Thursday.

Then comes the first absurdity. Despite having to book your appointment online, you cannot download an application form online. If you are applying from the UK, you must obtain an application form from a UK Post Office. I’m flying into Luton Airport, arriving at 20.45 on the evening of Wednesday 27^th July, when all Post Offices will be closed. I will then pick up my hire car and drive to Peterborough and stay there overnight. Do I really want to be driving around the suburbs of Peterborough the next morning, desperately trying to find a Post Office in advance of my appointment?

I enquired at the British Embassy here in Prague, whether they had any passport application forms, but they do not. I’ve eventually solved the problem by getting Phillip to go to a Post Office in Nottingham, obtain a form and post it to me. But I’m sure I’m not the first Brit living outside the UK who has run into this problem, one that could be easily solved by making the application form available online.

Having received the form in the post yesterday, I set about carefully filling in the required sections. One of these asks me to provide my current UK address. I don’t have one! Do I put down the address of the hotel where I am staying the previous night? Or the hotel in Nottingham where I’m staying for the wedding weekend? For the time being, I’ve left the section blank and will try to resolve that one at the Passport Office.

Obviously, I have to have two new passport photographs that comply with the guidance notes issued by HM Passport Office. As I am renewing an existing passport, the notes say that I need to have a photo countersigned, ‘only if you can’t be recognised from the photo in your current passport’. But who decides whether or not I can be recognised? Presumably, the member of staff who receives my application when I arrive for my appointment in Peterborough.

The photograph in my current passport is over ten years old, I now have less hair, and what hair I still have has gone grey. So the obvious thing to do is to have my new photograph countersigned as an insurance. But then I face Catch 22. If I am applying in the UK, the counter signatory needs to reside in the UK. How do I manage that when I’m only arriving the night before?

Whilst not quite Kafkaesque, all of this is certainly illogical and unhelpful. Watch this space to see if in two weeks time, I have been successful in my quest.

Living in Limbo-land

Just over two weeks ago, the UK voted by a small majority, in a non-binding referendum, to leave the European Union (EU). This result has left me, and around two million other UK citizens residing in other EU member states, living in Limbo-land, totally unsure about our future.

I have lived and worked in the Czech Republic since September 2008, on the basis of being a citizen of another EU member state. The free movement of people and labour is one of the founding principles of the EU. And as I wrote in a post earlier this year, it is my intention to retire in 2017 and live somewhere else within the EU, most likely in Spain. Now, because of the referendum, my future plans maybe completely scuppered.

There are two big questions to which I need answers. Firstly, will I as a British Citizen, be able to continue living within the EU, once the UK has made its Brexit? Secondly, what will happen to my UK state pension after Brexit? Let me explain more about each of these in turn.

The migration of many citizens from the countries of Central and Eastern Europe into the UK, and the perceived strain this has put on health, education and social services, was one of the major complaints of those arguing for people to vote ‘leave’. This despite the fact that most of these ‘immigrants’ are in employment, paying tax and national insurance, and frequently doing the jobs that British people don’t want to do. This news item that I read this morning, illustrates precisely the point I’m making.

If, as part of the UK leaving the EU, the ability of EU citizens to live and work in the UK is curtailed, the governments of the other 27 EU member states will not look kindly upon us Brits living in their countries. I would like to use the lump sum from my Church pension scheme, to purchase a small home in which to spend my retirement. But what do I then do if I’m told I cannot live their because I’m no longer an EU national?

I may have to seriously consider changing my nationality. I am given to understand, though have not yet thoroughly checked it out, that I could apply to be Czech as I’ve lived here for more than five years, and being over sixty, would not be required to pass a language test. The other alternative would be to become German because of being married to one. Sybille and I have been married to each other for nearly eleven years. Apparently, I could become German after being married to her for just three years. However, those three years of married life together, need to have been spent living in Germany 🙁 Ours have been spent in the UK and then in the Czech Republic.

Before leaving the UK in 2008, I had just completed paying sufficient National Insurance contributions to be entitled to receive the minimum UK state pension upon retirement. Since beginning work in the Czech Republic, I and the Church as my employer, have been making Czech social security payments, which means I will in due course, receive a small additional pension from the Czech state.

Under current EU regulations, those two state pensions would be combined and paid to me wherever I would be living within the EU in retirement. More importantly, that pension would be regularly uprated each year. But if Brexit happens, there is every likelihood that the UK part would be frozen and not increased in future years.

Unfortunately, nobody can provide answers to my two big questions, nor can they tell me when I might reasonably expect to receive answers. All those responsible for this mess are busy resigning. Messrs Cameron, Johnson and Farage have rightly been described as ‘rats abandoning the sinking ship’. They only concern they seem to have is for themselves. Meanwhile, I’m left living in Limbo-land 🙁

Last Sunday evening in Dresden

The River Elbe with the Frauenkirche beyond © Ricky Yates — The River Elbe in Dresden with the Frauenkirche beyond © Ricky Yates

Last Sunday evening, one week later than usual, I officiated at the English-language Anglican Service of Evening Prayer, hosted by the Frauenkirche in Dresden. At the beginning of the service, I welcomed all those attending, explained who I am, and then made three announcements.

The first was to apologise that, once more, my troublesome front crown, having managed to stay in place for the three previous months, had again become loose and then fallen out on Sunday morning. Besides making me look goofy, this also meant that speaking publicly was difficult as numerous speech sounds are made by putting your tongue to your front teeth and it is therefore somewhat difficult to be articulate, if there is a big gap 🙁

Secondly, I thanked everyone for attending, being very aware that the service had coincided with a rather important football match 🙂 Germany were playing Slovakia in the last sixteen of the Euro 2016 football competition, the match kicking off at exactly the same time as our service began.

But thirdly I said, I just wanted to clearly declare that, ‘Last Thursday, I voted to remain!’ The congregation of native English-speakers from around the world, together with English-speaking Germans, erupted in sympathetic laughter the like of which I’ve never experienced previously when officiating at the Frauenkirche.

I was originally going to write about the theme of the service and how I tackled it in my sermon, which had very clear resonances with the referendum result. But instead, in order to get this post published tonight and to keep it reasonably short in length, I just want to tell you of a conversation I had following the service, which encapsulates one very unpleasant aspect of the recent referendum campaign.

As I explained in a previous post, following worship, a small number of the regular Dresden congregation, gather for a drink in a nearby Bierstube, the Augustiner an der Frauenkirche. It being warm and dry, we were able to sit outside, enjoying the evening air and hearing a loud cheer from a nearby establishment, when Germany scored a third goal part-way through the second half of their match.

We were joined for the first time by an Anglophile German couple – Stephan and Kornelia. Stephan explained to me that he was a GP and had undertaken some of his medical studies in the UK, including his GP training, and had then worked as a GP for a few years in Mansfield, Nottinghamshire, before returning to Germany. He added that one of the reasons they had started attending the monthly English-language service was to ensure they didn’t lose their English!

But they then told me how their daughter had just finished her studies at Gymnasium, and had arranged to have gap year, before going to university. She had been accepted to work for a UK charity based in London, starting in July, providing respite care for the parents of handicapped children.

Hearing the outcome of the referendum on Friday morning, she had expressed to them her fear, that she might not now be able to do this. And even if she did, she was concerned as to how she would be perceived and received in current British society.

The ‘Leave campaign’ has released a very unpleasant current of xenophobia and racism meaning that a German young lady who wants to give something very positive to British society, is now left feeing very uncomfortable and wondering whether her chosen path was wise. Messrs Johnson, Gove and Farage – you have an awful lot to answer for!

My April 2016 visit to the UK – ICS Chaplains Conference

Alyson Lamb and Paul Vrolijk being interviewed by Richard Bromley, ICS Mission Director © Ricky Yates

As I explained in my earlier post, I spent the second half of my time in the UK, attending the annual ICS Chaplains Conference which this year took place at Ashburnham Place Conference Centre, near Battle in East Sussex. Whilst being conveniently located for reaching Dover and my return journey to Prague, I wasn’t otherwise very enamoured with the venue.

However, as always, I enjoyed meeting and hearing from my fellow Chaplains ministering in a variety of situations across Europe, and a couple from farther afield. And for the first time, I was invited to speak myself, giving what was billed as a ‘TED talk’, about my ministry in Prague, Brno and Dresden. It was very nice to have positive feedback from several of my colleagues following my talk, as well as an appreciative email from the ICS Mission Director when I returned to Prague.

In particular, it was both a privilege and a challenge to listen to my colleagues Alyson Lamb, Chaplain of St. Michael’s, Paris and Paul Vrolijk, Senior Chaplain of Holy Trinity, Brussels, speaking about their recent experience of terror attacks. Both had direct pastoral involvement with a member of Alyson’s congregation having a relative killed, and a member of Paul’s congregation being injured. Both also spoke the possibility of further attacks and of their respective Churches being possible targets.

Working myself in a European capital city, the possibility of similar events happening here, has often been in the back of my own mind. Likewise, being seen as a Western Christian Church, might even make us a target. Yet as both Alyson and Paul explained, you cannot put security measures in place without discouraging people from coming to worship.

For the final thirty-six hours of the conference, we were joined by my Diocesan Bishop Robert Innes. With Augustine Nwaekwe, a Nigerian priest who is Chaplain of Ostend and Bruges, they spoke about ministering to sub-Saharan Africans who are increasingly part of many of our congregations, including my own. What they both had to say was quite enlightening. Most memorable was learning an African expression addressed to Europeans. ‘You have watches – we have time’ 🙂

Chalices and paten with Mac © Ricky Yates

Bishop Robert was the Celebrant and Preacher at our Eucharist on the final evening of the conference. Whilst I do appreciate the value of modern technology, I was left to reflect whether we were to give thanks for the Holy Sacrament or for Steve Jobs? 🙂

My April 2016 visit to the UK – a family weekend

Jov and Phillip, awaiting the start of the match © Ricky Yates

After my two-day visit to North Wales, I headed back across Offa’s Dyke, to Nottingham in the English East Midlands, spending the weekend staying with my son Phillip and future daughter-in-law Lisa, in their recently purchased new home. This has a guest bedroom meaning no more sleeping in a cellar without windows, or in a sleeping bag on the settee, as I have in times past 🙂

Ever since his childhood growing up in North Oxfordshire, Phillip has been a fan of Oxford United FC and is currently a season ticket holder. Months previously, when I was organising this visit, we agreed that we would go down to Oxford together and watch OUFC play Hartlepool United on Saturday 23^rd April.

At that time, we didn’t know how critical the match would be. As it was, with this match and two more to go, OUFC were in third place in League Two and would gain automatic promotion if they were to win all three games, irrespective of any other results. Not surprisingly therefore, the game attracted a big crowd.

I drove us down to Bicester, from where we were driven onwards to the ground by Len, the father of Phillip’s friend Jov. It was a good game which ended in a 2 – 0 victory for Oxford United. For those who don’t follow these things, OUFC did also win their final two games, finished second in League Two and will thus play in League One next season.

On the morning of Sunday 24^th April, I took a five-minute walk from Phillip & Lisa’s home, to their parish Church of St Jude, attending the 09.15 service of Holy Communion. I did to the Vicar, Rev’d John Allister, what regularly happens to me in Prague, revealing myself as a fellow Anglican priest at the end of the service. In Prague, this happens with some frequency – on the Sunday after Easter, I even had a bishop in mufti, with his wife, worshipping with us.

The Parish Church of St. Jude, Mapperley, Nottingham © Ricky Yates

John Allister and I had previously been in email conversation but this was the first time we had met in person. He has kindly given permission for me to officiate at Phillip and Lisa’s forthcoming wedding at the end of July, which will take place in his Church. As I have often said, the geography of the Church building, does influence the way a wedding is conducted, so it was good to see the inside of the Church as well as receiving some helpful practical advice from John.

The adjacent Church Hall of St. Jude's where Phillip & Lisa will hold their wedding reception © Ricky Yates — The adjacent Church Hall of St. Jude’s where Phillip & Lisa will hold their wedding reception © Ricky Yates

Early on Sunday afternoon, my daughter Christa, son-in-law Ian, together with my grandson Finley arrived, having driven up from Daventry where they live. Lisa cooked us a late Sunday lunch which we all enjoyed together. I must apologise to the ladies, that I only have photographs of the male members of the family to illustrate this post. Below is Ian, reading to Finley, the book being a small present from me to my grandson.

Ian reading Finley's new book to him © Ricky Yates — Ian reading Finley’s new book to him © Ricky Yates

And below is a delightful photograph of Finley, enjoying toddling about in Phillip and Lisa’s garden.