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Living in a flat in the Czech Republic

The block of flats in which we live © Ricky Yates

Nearly eight years ago, Sybille and I moved from the North Oxfordshire countryside to Prague, and from a four-bedroomed detached Rectory with several downstairs rooms, to a three-bedroomed flat with a sitting room and a minute kitchen. Not only did this mean us undertaking a massive and therapeutic downsizing exercise, it also means we now have close neighbours – several of them!

Our flat is on the second floor at the end of the block. It is identifiable by the orange coloured bedspread which was drying on a clothes rack on our main balcony, when this photograph was taken. Because we are on the end of the block, we only physically abut one other flat, (to the right of our main balcony in the photo), with one shared wall and a frosted glass panel that divides our respective balconies.

When we first moved into our new home, this small neighbouring flat was owned and occupied by a Czech young lady called Lucie. We soon discovered that Lucie was a singer as we frequently heard her practising her scales 🙁 The other notable thing about Lucie was that in warm, sunny, summer weather, she enjoyed being out on her balcony wearing a pink bikini 🙂

About two years ago, Lucie sold the flat to a young couple, Zuzana and Filip. They made some alterations to the flat – we heard the banging and hammering 🙁 But what we didn’t initially realise was that a year ago, Zuzana and Filip moved out and started renting out their flat through Airbnb. We only discovered this in early September 2015, when Sybille overheard three young men speaking in German on the neighbouring balcony. She asked, in German, through the glass, who they were and what they were doing there. They were from Konstanz and Airbnb guests.

You can learn all about this ‘fully equipped studio’ here. The webpage contains some delightful Czenglish including offering ‘one double bad’. This is obviously either a sizeable German bath or a large amount of trouble! There are a series of seven photographs and the second one is of the balcony, looking towards our main balcony. Sybille’s green watering can is clearly visible through the glass 🙂

So far, our various Airbnb neighbours haven’t caused us too many problems. A few months back, three Australian young ladies were making quite a racket at 22.30 on Saturday night. I buzzed the door bell and pointedly remarked that, ‘Some of us have to work tomorrow!’ More recently, a group of young Spanish males got quite a surprise when being told to be quieter by Sybille, in her fluent Spanish!

Long-standing readers of my blog will know that we discovered who lived in the flat immediately above us, when in December 2010, we experienced Christmas Carp induced flooding. Follow the link if you do not know the story. Ever since that event, we have always referred to the owner of the flat directly above us, as ‘Mr Water Engineer’ 😉

Two or three years ago, a lady appeared on the scene and moved in. Initially we referred to her as ‘Mr Water Engineer’s girlfriend’. We would often see her out running, obviously keen to be fit and keep slim. But then in her quest for fitness, she bought herself an exercise bike. And unlike most other purchasers of exercise bikes, she actually uses it – regularly!

In both the sitting room, where Sybille has her desk, and in the bedroom which I use as my office, we regularly hear ‘de-da-de-da-de-da-de-da’, as she peddles away. So the lady is now known as ‘Mrs Hamster Wheel’, because that is what it exactly sounds like 🙁 As her bike riding sessions usually last for between one-and-a-half and two hours, we regularly use their commencement as an excuse to head to one of our nearby bar-restaurants 🙂

For legal and other reasons, I shall refrain from any comments regarding the couple and their daughter, who live in the flat immediately below us. But recently, there have been some interesting changes in flat below that – the one situated on the ground floor.

The ground floor flat, two storeys below ours, has a garden. Because it is on the end of the block, the garden extends on three sides, though the section at the rear is very narrow. Back in 2008, when we moved in above, this ground floor flat was owned and occupied by a couple and their child. A couple of years later, a second child was born.

They also had a lively Jack Russell terrier who enjoyed running around the garden and barking at anyone who passed by. The dog’s name was Gazpacho – quite why he should be named after a cold Spanish soup, we never discovered. He was colloquially known as ‘Gazpi’ and we always referred to his owners as ‘Mr & Mrs Gazpi’.

Late last year, Mr & Mrs Gazpi moved out and put the flat up for sale. As we discovered, by checking the sale particulars online, the flat is only about two-thirds the size of ours, because it loses space to the entrance lobby of the block.

Earlier this year, the new owner moved in. She is a lady who I think is in her late forties, though I do recognise that judging a lady’s age is entering into seriously dangerous territory 😉 As she has two different surnames on her mail box, I presume that she is a recent divorcee who is reverting to her maiden surname, but realises that mail may still come addressed to her in her married name. Also on the mail box, is the name of her teenage son who has the male form of one of her surnames.

This lady clearly saw the potential of this flat and particularly, the garden. Although, as you can see in the photograph, the hedge around the garden is already quite mature, she has placed basket-woven fencing inside the hedge for greater privacy. She has also blocked up the bottom of the garden gate, to ensure that the third member of her family, a large, grey floppy-eared rabbit, doesn’t escape!

About two months ago, a workman arrived and started digging a large hole in the garden, directly below our balcony. It being a fairly hot day, in typical Czech fashion, he stripped down to his boxer shorts to do so! He returned over the following days to line the large hole with a cement render and then lay a thick black plastic membrane, in order to create a pond.

Timber was delivered and, after the new owner had brushed timber preservative over it several times, another couple of workmen arrived to convert the timber into decking, all around the newly created pond. Here is the end result, as viewed from our balcony, two floors above.

Michaela's new pond, as seen from our balcony © Ricky Yates — The new pond, as seen from our balcony © Ricky Yates

I have to say that the end result is very attractive. However now, on some occasions when it is warm and sunny, our new neighbour stands in her pond, or sunbathes on the decking, wearing a lacy g-string and nothing else! Whilst she has created some privacy at a ground-floor level, I am left to wonder whether she ever thought about those of us who live directly above. We do like to look out from our balcony from time to time, and frequently as we do, we are greeted with yet another ‘only in the Czech Republic‘ moment 🙂

Dealing with British bureaucracy

My British passport which still currently declares me to be an EU citizen © Ricky Yates — My current British passport © Ricky Yates

Long-standing readers of my blog will know that I have previously written numerous times about my various run-ins with Czech bureaucracy. For example, trying to exchange my UK driving licence for a Czech one, which I described as ‘a Kafkaesque experience‘. Therefore I think it is only fair that I should also write about some illogicalities of British bureaucracy that I’m currently dealing with.

As I explained in an earlier post, my UK passport expires in December 2016. Whilst because of Brexit, I am giving serious consideration of changing my nationality should I lose the right to freely reside in any EU member state, that will not happen before December. Therefore, I have had to sort out how and when I can obtain a new UK passport.

As I explained in that earlier post and in response to comments on it, the days of the British Embassy issuing new passports to its citizens resident here are long gone – everything has been centralised in the UK. And because I cannot risk being without my passport for up to four weeks, which is what would be the case if I were to apply from Prague, completing an online application form, paying the fee and then sending everything off to a UK Passport Office, I’ve decided to bite the bullet.

I am going to use Her Majesty’s Passport Office Premium Service which should result in my new passport being issued to me, no more than four hours after submitting my application. Of course, this doesn’t come cheap; it costs £128.00 which I’ve already paid. Ironically, I’ve actually benefited from one consequence of the recent Brexit referendum. The fall in the value of Sterling means paying that fee has cost me CZK 300 less than it would have done on Thursday 23^rd June 🙂

I have arranged to fly to the UK on the evening of Wednesday 27^th July, one day earlier than I was originally going to do, in order to officiate at my son Phillip’s wedding. I will then spend most of the following day in Peterborough, obtaining my new passport. But this is where British bureaucracy is unthinking and leaves much to be desired, for those who like me, live outside of the UK.

To use Her Majesty’s Passport Office Premium Service, you have to go online and book an appointment at a Passport Office, in my case the one in Peterborough, and pay the £128.00 fee. But it is only possible to book an appointment no more than three weeks in advance. I’ve had my flight booked for a couple of months, but was only able to get a definite appointment last Thursday.

Then comes the first absurdity. Despite having to book your appointment online, you cannot download an application form online. If you are applying from the UK, you must obtain an application form from a UK Post Office. I’m flying into Luton Airport, arriving at 20.45 on the evening of Wednesday 27^th July, when all Post Offices will be closed. I will then pick up my hire car and drive to Peterborough and stay there overnight. Do I really want to be driving around the suburbs of Peterborough the next morning, desperately trying to find a Post Office in advance of my appointment?

I enquired at the British Embassy here in Prague, whether they had any passport application forms, but they do not. I’ve eventually solved the problem by getting Phillip to go to a Post Office in Nottingham, obtain a form and post it to me. But I’m sure I’m not the first Brit living outside the UK who has run into this problem, one that could be easily solved by making the application form available online.

Having received the form in the post yesterday, I set about carefully filling in the required sections. One of these asks me to provide my current UK address. I don’t have one! Do I put down the address of the hotel where I am staying the previous night? Or the hotel in Nottingham where I’m staying for the wedding weekend? For the time being, I’ve left the section blank and will try to resolve that one at the Passport Office.

Obviously, I have to have two new passport photographs that comply with the guidance notes issued by HM Passport Office. As I am renewing an existing passport, the notes say that I need to have a photo countersigned, ‘only if you can’t be recognised from the photo in your current passport’. But who decides whether or not I can be recognised? Presumably, the member of staff who receives my application when I arrive for my appointment in Peterborough.

The photograph in my current passport is over ten years old, I now have less hair, and what hair I still have has gone grey. So the obvious thing to do is to have my new photograph countersigned as an insurance. But then I face Catch 22. If I am applying in the UK, the counter signatory needs to reside in the UK. How do I manage that when I’m only arriving the night before?

Whilst not quite Kafkaesque, all of this is certainly illogical and unhelpful. Watch this space to see if in two weeks time, I have been successful in my quest.

Living in Limbo-land

Just over two weeks ago, the UK voted by a small majority, in a non-binding referendum, to leave the European Union (EU). This result has left me, and around two million other UK citizens residing in other EU member states, living in Limbo-land, totally unsure about our future.

I have lived and worked in the Czech Republic since September 2008, on the basis of being a citizen of another EU member state. The free movement of people and labour is one of the founding principles of the EU. And as I wrote in a post earlier this year, it is my intention to retire in 2017 and live somewhere else within the EU, most likely in Spain. Now, because of the referendum, my future plans maybe completely scuppered.

There are two big questions to which I need answers. Firstly, will I as a British Citizen, be able to continue living within the EU, once the UK has made its Brexit? Secondly, what will happen to my UK state pension after Brexit? Let me explain more about each of these in turn.

The migration of many citizens from the countries of Central and Eastern Europe into the UK, and the perceived strain this has put on health, education and social services, was one of the major complaints of those arguing for people to vote ‘leave’. This despite the fact that most of these ‘immigrants’ are in employment, paying tax and national insurance, and frequently doing the jobs that British people don’t want to do. This news item that I read this morning, illustrates precisely the point I’m making.

If, as part of the UK leaving the EU, the ability of EU citizens to live and work in the UK is curtailed, the governments of the other 27 EU member states will not look kindly upon us Brits living in their countries. I would like to use the lump sum from my Church pension scheme, to purchase a small home in which to spend my retirement. But what do I then do if I’m told I cannot live their because I’m no longer an EU national?

I may have to seriously consider changing my nationality. I am given to understand, though have not yet thoroughly checked it out, that I could apply to be Czech as I’ve lived here for more than five years, and being over sixty, would not be required to pass a language test. The other alternative would be to become German because of being married to one. Sybille and I have been married to each other for nearly eleven years. Apparently, I could become German after being married to her for just three years. However, those three years of married life together, need to have been spent living in Germany 🙁 Ours have been spent in the UK and then in the Czech Republic.

Before leaving the UK in 2008, I had just completed paying sufficient National Insurance contributions to be entitled to receive the minimum UK state pension upon retirement. Since beginning work in the Czech Republic, I and the Church as my employer, have been making Czech social security payments, which means I will in due course, receive a small additional pension from the Czech state.

Under current EU regulations, those two state pensions would be combined and paid to me wherever I would be living within the EU in retirement. More importantly, that pension would be regularly uprated each year. But if Brexit happens, there is every likelihood that the UK part would be frozen and not increased in future years.

Unfortunately, nobody can provide answers to my two big questions, nor can they tell me when I might reasonably expect to receive answers. All those responsible for this mess are busy resigning. Messrs Cameron, Johnson and Farage have rightly been described as ‘rats abandoning the sinking ship’. They only concern they seem to have is for themselves. Meanwhile, I’m left living in Limbo-land 🙁

Last Sunday evening in Dresden

The River Elbe with the Frauenkirche beyond © Ricky Yates — The River Elbe in Dresden with the Frauenkirche beyond © Ricky Yates

Last Sunday evening, one week later than usual, I officiated at the English-language Anglican Service of Evening Prayer, hosted by the Frauenkirche in Dresden. At the beginning of the service, I welcomed all those attending, explained who I am, and then made three announcements.

The first was to apologise that, once more, my troublesome front crown, having managed to stay in place for the three previous months, had again become loose and then fallen out on Sunday morning. Besides making me look goofy, this also meant that speaking publicly was difficult as numerous speech sounds are made by putting your tongue to your front teeth and it is therefore somewhat difficult to be articulate, if there is a big gap 🙁

Secondly, I thanked everyone for attending, being very aware that the service had coincided with a rather important football match 🙂 Germany were playing Slovakia in the last sixteen of the Euro 2016 football competition, the match kicking off at exactly the same time as our service began.

But thirdly I said, I just wanted to clearly declare that, ‘Last Thursday, I voted to remain!’ The congregation of native English-speakers from around the world, together with English-speaking Germans, erupted in sympathetic laughter the like of which I’ve never experienced previously when officiating at the Frauenkirche.

I was originally going to write about the theme of the service and how I tackled it in my sermon, which had very clear resonances with the referendum result. But instead, in order to get this post published tonight and to keep it reasonably short in length, I just want to tell you of a conversation I had following the service, which encapsulates one very unpleasant aspect of the recent referendum campaign.

As I explained in a previous post, following worship, a small number of the regular Dresden congregation, gather for a drink in a nearby Bierstube, the Augustiner an der Frauenkirche. It being warm and dry, we were able to sit outside, enjoying the evening air and hearing a loud cheer from a nearby establishment, when Germany scored a third goal part-way through the second half of their match.

We were joined for the first time by an Anglophile German couple – Stephan and Kornelia. Stephan explained to me that he was a GP and had undertaken some of his medical studies in the UK, including his GP training, and had then worked as a GP for a few years in Mansfield, Nottinghamshire, before returning to Germany. He added that one of the reasons they had started attending the monthly English-language service was to ensure they didn’t lose their English!

But they then told me how their daughter had just finished her studies at Gymnasium, and had arranged to have gap year, before going to university. She had been accepted to work for a UK charity based in London, starting in July, providing respite care for the parents of handicapped children.

Hearing the outcome of the referendum on Friday morning, she had expressed to them her fear, that she might not now be able to do this. And even if she did, she was concerned as to how she would be perceived and received in current British society.

The ‘Leave campaign’ has released a very unpleasant current of xenophobia and racism meaning that a German young lady who wants to give something very positive to British society, is now left feeing very uncomfortable and wondering whether her chosen path was wise. Messrs Johnson, Gove and Farage – you have an awful lot to answer for!

My April 2016 visit to the UK – ICS Chaplains Conference

Alyson Lamb and Paul Vrolijk being interviewed by Richard Bromley, ICS Mission Director © Ricky Yates

As I explained in my earlier post, I spent the second half of my time in the UK, attending the annual ICS Chaplains Conference which this year took place at Ashburnham Place Conference Centre, near Battle in East Sussex. Whilst being conveniently located for reaching Dover and my return journey to Prague, I wasn’t otherwise very enamoured with the venue.

However, as always, I enjoyed meeting and hearing from my fellow Chaplains ministering in a variety of situations across Europe, and a couple from farther afield. And for the first time, I was invited to speak myself, giving what was billed as a ‘TED talk’, about my ministry in Prague, Brno and Dresden. It was very nice to have positive feedback from several of my colleagues following my talk, as well as an appreciative email from the ICS Mission Director when I returned to Prague.

In particular, it was both a privilege and a challenge to listen to my colleagues Alyson Lamb, Chaplain of St. Michael’s, Paris and Paul Vrolijk, Senior Chaplain of Holy Trinity, Brussels, speaking about their recent experience of terror attacks. Both had direct pastoral involvement with a member of Alyson’s congregation having a relative killed, and a member of Paul’s congregation being injured. Both also spoke the possibility of further attacks and of their respective Churches being possible targets.

Working myself in a European capital city, the possibility of similar events happening here, has often been in the back of my own mind. Likewise, being seen as a Western Christian Church, might even make us a target. Yet as both Alyson and Paul explained, you cannot put security measures in place without discouraging people from coming to worship.

For the final thirty-six hours of the conference, we were joined by my Diocesan Bishop Robert Innes. With Augustine Nwaekwe, a Nigerian priest who is Chaplain of Ostend and Bruges, they spoke about ministering to sub-Saharan Africans who are increasingly part of many of our congregations, including my own. What they both had to say was quite enlightening. Most memorable was learning an African expression addressed to Europeans. ‘You have watches – we have time’ 🙂

Chalices and paten with Mac © Ricky Yates

Bishop Robert was the Celebrant and Preacher at our Eucharist on the final evening of the conference. Whilst I do appreciate the value of modern technology, I was left to reflect whether we were to give thanks for the Holy Sacrament or for Steve Jobs? 🙂