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Mistaken Identity

Dalmatian islands seen from the coast road between Senj and Zadar © Ricky Yates

On Monday 6^th July, we drove right across Austria via Linz in the north to Klagenfurt in the south. As we did so, the rain got heavier and heavier so that, as we headed towards the steep mountain pass that would take us into Slovenia, it was positively tipping it down. The weather was no better on the Slovenian side of the border. However, as we joined the motorway to head south towards Ljubljana, (having purchased an expensive vignette to travel relatively few km of motorway), the rain slowly started to ease. And having bypassed Ljubljana and travelled on to Postojna where we left the motorway for the somewhat windy road that leads to the Croatian border, the sun came out as though to welcome us to our holiday destination.

At the Slovenian – Croatian border we had our passports checked for the first time on our journey. I couldn’t help but reflect on the irony of the situation and how the political geography of Europe has changed in the last twenty years. We had crossed from the Czech Republic to Austria and from Austria to Slovenia where, in both cases, border controls are now non-existent because all three countries are EU members and also part of the Schengen agreement. Yet now we were having our passports checked at a border that used not to exist until the beginning of the 1990s with the break-up of Yugoslavia.

It was also as we had our passports checked on the Croatian side of the border, that questions about our somewhat complex identity first raised their head as we tried to explain why a Brit and a German were travelling in a car with Czech number plates! This was the prelude to two cases of mistaken identity that occurred the following day.

We spent Monday night in the small Croatian coastal town of Senj. On Tuesday morning, after the secession of an early morning thunderstorm, we set out along the winding coastal road towards Zadar with wonderful views across to nearby islands. As we drove, we passed three motorcycles parked at the side of the road. Their riders & pillion passengers who were having a mid-morning break, waved to us in a very friendly fashion. We waved back and soon realised that the reason they were waving was because they were Czech and thought they were waving to fellow Czechs. Suddenly their friendly smiles turned to very quizzical looks when they noticed that my steering wheel was on the ‘wrong’ side!

Later in the day as we approached Zadar, we used a short section of motorway. As we turned off the motorway to drive into Zadar, we had to present our ticket and pay a small toll. Sybille wound down the car window and gave our ticket to the young man in the toll booth. ‘Pet’ he said, which is the word for ‘five’ in Czech. (There should be a hacek over the ‘e’ to lengthen the sound but most computer browsers won’t cope with it if I put one in and will instead render it as a ‘?’)! He seeing the Czech number plates was trying to be helpful and tell us in Czech, that we needed to pay five kuna, bearing in mind that both Czech and Croatian are Slavic languages with similar vocabularies. He couldn’t understand our blank looks until he saw where my steering wheel was located. ‘Five kuna’ he then said, and we paid!

Journey to Croatia

After being the Anglican Chaplain in Prague for just over nine months, I’ve finally taken a proper holiday (vacation to the American readers of this blog) as, having celebrated the Eucharist on the morning of Sunday 5^th July I am not officiating at Sunday worship again in Prague until Sunday 26^th July. This is the reason why I haven’t posted anything on this blog since the end of June until today.

I wrote a number of blog posts whilst we were away in the hope of being able to post them from where we were staying. But the facilities and opportunity to do this never materialised so instead I will be posting them over the next few days now I’m back in Prague.

We decided to have a completely unplanned holiday with absolutely nothing booked in advance. The only thing we decided was to travel in the car to Croatia and spend some time relaxing on one of the numerous islands that lie parallel to the Dalmatian coast. Therefore, having written those last few emails, tried to remember to pack everything we might need, unloaded the dishwasher for the last time and put out the recycling and rubbish, just before 5pm on Sunday 5^th July, we finally set out.

The aim of our drive that Sunday evening was to at least leave the Czech Republic and reach somewhere in Austria. Leaving the flat in Prague as late as 5pm meant we would not get as far into Austria as I’d originally envisioned. However, there was remarkably little traffic about and we reached Ceské Budejovice in an hour and fifty minutes, ten minutes quicker than when I’d driven there the once previously. Beyond Ceské Budejovice, we entered territory that was totally new to both of us. And as we did so, we had two experiences which we were really not expecting.

After travelling on from Ceské Budejovice for about half an hour, we were within two or three km of the Austrian border when we saw a woman standing at the side of the road. She had bleached blonde hair and was wearing an exceedingly short skirt, together with a bra top that left a large amount of midriff on view. I remarked to Sybille that there was bit too much flesh on show & she agreed. Then, within a hundred metres there was another young woman in a short halter neck sun dress followed by a third in a short frilly miniskirt and a very cropped crop top. It was only when we saw the third young woman that we both realised what we were seeing. All three were prostitutes openly touting for business. Slightly further on, on the other side of the road, we saw at least four more.

Whilst the fall of the Iron Curtain twenty years ago, has undoubtedly brought massive change for the better in the lives of the bulk of the population of the former communist counties of Central & Eastern Europe, some changes have been for the worse. In particular, laws in relation to gambling in the Czech Republic are now either lax or almost non-existent. When travelling along the Nürnberg – Prague motorway, I had seen signs to casinos, strategically located just inside the Czech Republic, enticing Germans to cross the border and gamble, freed from the strict regulation of gambling in their own country. And here on the Czech – Austrian border it was the same as I observed several hotel-casinos just before we left the Czech Republic and entered Austria. And with gambling has come prostitution.

What we observed was the bottom end of the market. No doubt, the ‘higher class girls’ work out of the hotels. Whereas police seem to be everywhere in Prague, here they were noticeable by their absence. I am well aware that there are complex issues, both legal and moral, in relation to prostitution and gambling which I’m not going to try and address in this blog post. But that evening, I saw something I had never seen before in my life and certainly something neither of us had expected to see on our journey from the Czech Republic to Austria.

On entering Austria, we decided to make for Freistadt, the first town of note on our route. Freistadt has a well preserved mediaeval town centre, surrounded by much of the original walls and is very picturesque. We found a reasonably priced room in a pension situated in the heart of the mediaeval centre and then found place to eat. But as we explored the town after our meal, we had our second experience that we were not expecting. Here, on a sunny Sunday evening in July, in a picturesque town in Oberösterreich, there was hardly a soul to be seen. And as we looked more closely at the shops and businesses, we noticed that many were having closing down sales or had already closed down and were for sale. There were no longer tourists visiting the town in their usual numbers and therefore little business for the shops. We also discovered that there were only two other people staying overnight in our pension.

Living in Prague, we have not really experienced the worldwide economic downturn as such. Czech banks have not overextended themselves with dodgy loans and the like and therefore the effects tend to be secondary with fewer tourists visiting the city and more hotel rooms free. But there are still plenty of tourists about. However, in Freistadt in Oberösterreich, the full effects of the current economic crisis were manifest in a manner that neither of us was expecting to see.

I must apologise that unusually, this blog post is not accompanied by a photo. For obvious reasons, I didn’t take any pictures of the ladies at the side of the road! And for reasons I cannot explain, neither of us took any photos of Freistadt.

My first Czech Wedding

Lea & Petra at Bouzov Castle © Ricky Yates

Earlier this year I received an email from an English young man called Lea, asking if there was a Czech language version of the Anglican ‘Common Worship’ Marriage Service. He was planning to marry a Czech young lady called Petra, at a venue near her home town of Olomouc in the east of the Czech Republic, and this was the liturgy that they wanted to use. As there would be both English and Czech speakers attending the wedding, they wanted the text in both languages.

One of the many helpful things left by my predecessor John Philpott, was a ‘Word document’ containing exactly the text that Lea had asked for. I forwarded it to him but wrote an accompanying note asking who was going to use it? If they were going to be married by an English-speaking minister from one of the Czech Churches, then surely that minister would want to use his/her own Church’s liturgy. On the other hand, if they were going to have a Czech civil ceremony followed by a Church service conducted by an Anglican priest imported for the occasion, then it was common courtesy for me, as the Anglican priest for the area concerned, to be consulted.

In reply, Lea and Petra explained that they didn’t yet have anyone to use the liturgy. But they had booked their wedding venue, the ‘chapel’ in Bouzov Castle, and that they had met with the local registrar and were in the process of completing all the necessary preliminaries to enable a legal wedding to take place. Once I explained that, because of my status as a priest in the Old Catholic Church in the Czech Republic, I could legally marry them, then they promptly invited me to do so. Thus on Friday 3^rd July, I conducted my first Czech wedding and my first wedding of any variety since mid-August 2008.

Olomouc is a historic city in Moravia, part of the Czech Republic that neither of us had previously visited. Although it should only take about two and a half hours to drive there from Prague, we decided not to risk it and drove down on the Thursday evening in order to ensure we reached the wedding venue in good time the next day. Some good internet research by Sybille found us a very comfortable double room in the Poet’s Corner Hostel, an extremely interesting establishment owned and run by an ex-pat Australian.

Our ‘Lonely Planet’ Guide to the Czech & Slovak Republics describes Olomouc as ‘Prague minus the tourists’ and it is an apt description. We ate our evening meal in an open air restaurant on the square in the historic centre of the city. The architectural views surrounding us are reminiscent of Old Town Square in Prague. However, other than a small amount of German, we heard no other language spoken that evening except Czech and were far from being surrounded by hordes of people.

The next morning, after leisurely breakfast, we put on our best clothes and set off on the forty minute drive to Bouzov Castle. The castle is situated in the small village of Bouzov set in the rolling wooded hills of Moravia. It was a spectacular sight to see as we drove towards it. After parking in the official car park, we walked up to the main entrance to await the arrival of the wedding party. We had been warned that we would need to be admitted as one group all together to avoid any confusion, as the castle is also open to paying visitors. Eventually, everybody arrived and we were all escorted over the castle bridge and up the stairs to the the ‘chapel’.

As we had discussed back in April when I had met Lea & Petra for the first time, everybody had an order of service with the English liturgy on one side and the Czech translation on the other, using the very material that had been the subject of Lea’s original enquiry. Whilst I conducted the service in English, I did manage to greet the congregation at the beginning in Czech. I was assisted by a wonderful lady called Ivana, who helped Petra make her vows in Czech after Lea had made his in English. She also translated my short address into Czech.

My greatest fear was getting the registration of the marriage wrong. In advance of the service, I had filled out a four-page form all in Czech, which being part of Czech bureaucracy, inevitably required an immense amount of detailed information about the bride and groom, their respective parents, both witnesses and me. This included full name and address, date and place of birth, birth number for Czechs, passport number for non Czechs! Fortunately, John Philpott had also left me an annotated version of this form with guidance as to how to fill it out. Having completed it following his instructions, I got the ever-faithful Gerry Turner to double check what I’d done in Czech, before we set out for Olmouc.

It is this form, rather than two sets of Church registers, that is signed during the wedding service. Again, as I have explained previously in this blog, not only signed but, much more importantly, stamped!! As I raised my hand above the stamp that declares us to be the English-speaking parish of the Old Catholic Church in the Czech Republic, I said in English & Ivana said in Czech, “This is the most important part of a Czech marriage service!” Everybody smiled and laughed as I very firmly slammed the stamp down. It is this signed and stamped form which must be returned to the local registrar within two working days. The registrar will then issue the happy couple with their marriage certificate.

The service over, we were all escorted back out of the castle and then the newly married Lea and Petra walked down from the castle bridge hand-in-hand. As you can see, you cannot really have a much better setting than Bouzov Castle for your wedding photographs. An evening reception followed back in Olomouc.

Breakfast & Study at Bohemia Bagel

Bohemia Bagel in Old Town, Prague © Ricky Yates — Bohemia Bagel in Staré Mesto/Old Town, Prague © Ricky Yates

This morning, I had my last ‘working breakfast’ for nine weeks when our Breakfast Prayer & Study Group met for the final time before taking a summer break. A small group of us gather at 08.15 each Tuesday morning to share breakfast together and enjoy a lively discussion, usually ending with a short time of prayer.

We meet in a wonderful location in centre of Staré Mesto/Old Town Prague at Bohemia Bagel. It was only today, when taking this photograph in anticipation of writing a blog post, that I realised that it is ‘Bagel’ singular and not what everyone says which is ‘Bohemia Bagels’. This café, founded in 1996 by a team of American and Czech entrepreneurs, was responsible for making the bagel, long popular in the west, available to Czech people for the first time. There are now five branches of Bohemia Bagel in Prague, the branch where we meet being the original one.

They do a wonderful breakfast special of a bagel (several varieties to choose from) filled with a fried egg, bacon & melted cheese together with a bottomless mug of coffee or soft drink. All this for 89Kc (just under £3). This breakfast more than compensates for the early start attending the meeting involves! The food, together with the central location, makes it the ideal venue. The only disadvantage is the background music which can often be described as ‘interesting’ and isn’t always conducive to quiet prayer!

For the past several months, we’ve been discussing successive chapters from a book by the American Presbyterian Minister, John Ortberg entitled, ‘When the game is over, it all goes back in the box’. The ‘game’ of the title is the ‘game of life’ though the author uses many examples from various sports and board games, to illustrate what he is trying to say. Inevitably, the ones taken from American football and baseball were totally lost on me! Today we completed the book by discussing the last two chapters.

Ortberg was an author I had not come across previously. However, some longer standing members of the group had previously read and discussed another of his books entitled, ‘If you want to walk on water you’ve got to get out of the boat’ and recommended that we tackle this new one. And I’m glad we did! Ortberg’s main thrust is the need to live our lives being ‘rich towards God’ which should be the object of the ‘game’, recognising that the true prize is the one that unlocks the gate to the Kingdom of God.

Over these past months, we’ve had many discussions as to how practically we can live being ‘rich towards God’ and what that should mean for each of us. How do we avoid adopting secular values, especially in making choices and judgements in our daily work? And today we considered the need to recognise our own mortality and to live in the light of that immutable fact.

We plan to resume on Tuesday 1^st September and study the Letter to the Hebrews from the New Testament. Whilst it is good to have a summer break I shall look forward to our Tuesday morning meetings restarting in September, both for the fellowship and stimulating discussion and for the most enjoyable bagel breakfast!

Check this Czech car out!

This morning, I walked out of the offices of ‘Praha Hlavní Mesto’ in the centre of Prague with an incredible sense of satisfaction. I had achieved what I had been told so many times, by a whole variety of people, was impossible to achieve. In my rucksack were Czech number plates and a Czech registration document for my previously British registered right-hand drive (RHD) car. Today my red Renault Megane Scenic has legally become a Czech car!

It should really be what we have achieved as I would never have managed to do this without the help and support of Sybille, the knowledge of the whole variety of procedures to obtain the appropriate protocols which came from Adrian Blank of Nepomuk, together with being accompanied through the final stages by Gerry Turner speaking in Czech on my behalf.

In my previous post entitled “Driving on the ‘right’ side of the road”; I explained how Gerry & I had gone to the imposing offices of the Czech Ministry of Transport on Wednesday 3^rd June, to submit my application and accompanying papers for a ‘Certificate of Exemption’ for my RHD car. Adrian of Nepomuk had said that I should receive the certificate a week to ten days after submitting the application. When after two weeks, I had neither heard nor received anything; Gerry made a phone call asking what was happening. “Oh it will be in our system and we can take up to four weeks to process it” was the somewhat unhelpful answer given to Gerry. However, on Monday 22^nd June, a registered letter arrived at our flat containing the certificate of exemption. The fact that the certificate was dated 17^th June 2009, the date of Gerry’s phone call, does seem a little more than coincidence!

On the afternoon of Monday 22^nd, I duly delivered the certificate to the Magistrát office in Vysorany, Prague 9 where all my other papers were already lodged. I had to return to the office on Tuesday to put two signatures onto the completed paperwork. Then it was a third visit in three days to collect the completed file on Wednesday. On this third occasion, Gerry accompanied me to ensure I discovered correctly what to do next.

We were told to go to the offices of ‘Praha Hlavní Mesto’ in the centre of Prague, pay 3000 Kc (about £100) environmental fee as my emissions are only ‘Euro 2 standard’, and there I would finally be issued with a Czech registration document and Czech number plates. We hopped on the tram, changed onto the Metro and arrived at the correct office. Through the good offices of Gerry, we explained to the lady on the information desk, what I had come to do. She checked through all the papers giving her approval to everything I had until she asked, “Do you have your insurance certificate with you?” What was the one thing I had not got with me????

So it was that Gerry and I reconvened at the offices of ‘Praha Hlavní Mesto’ at 9.30am this morning. We took our numbered ticket and waited for our number to come up on the electronic board to tell us which kiosk to attend. After about a half hour wait we were summoned.

The lady at kiosk 35 was perfectly friendly. We presented all my papers, including my insurance certificate. “Did I have my passport and residency document with me, not just the photocopies in the file?” Fortunately I had anticipated that one! “Had I personally imported the car?” This question reflects the concern of the Czech authorities of a glut of cheap second-hand British RHD cars being brought into the Czech Republic by unscrupulous dealers. “Did I have 3000 Kc to pay the environmental charge?” I went off to the cash desk, handed over the cash and returned with a receipt.

Then the magic moment came. Number plates were produced from a drawer. Stickers were attached, marked to show the end date of the validity of my mechanical and emissions protocols. A registration document in two parts, showing my new car registration number and my full name and address, came out of the computer printer. All these were presented to me. As a parting gesture, the lady then said to me in Czech, “May God bless you”. Gerry replied by telling her in Czech, how appropriate her words were as she had just said them to the English-speaking Anglican Priest in Prague. The poor lady nearly fell off her chair both with shock and with laughter!

This afternoon, the car underwent it’s transformation from being a British car to being a Czech car. Off came the British number plates and the ‘GB’ sticker. Using the British plates as a template, I successfully drilled two holes in each of the Czech plates and then proudly screwed them onto the car before, of course, posing for the photograph!